theothegrey

This past Sunday as I was teaching my prayer and journaling class, a bizarre meeting started taking place in my mind. I was reading to the class an extended quote from Peter Scazzero’s book, The Emotionally Healthy Church. The thought entered my head, what if Bob Pierce met Jack Bauer?

Scazzero tells a brief story about Bob Pierce’s life. It’s tragic. He started World Vision after seeing so many children orphaned by war and dying from starvation and disease. (World Vision is an amazing organization and it’s pretty much the only Christian organization whose logo I don’t mind wearing on a T-shirt.) The Bob Pierce on the outside changed the lives of millions of children around the world. But, the Bob Pierce on the inside was an emotional wreck. He had a temper that grew over the course of his life. He was detached from his family. He went through seasons where he didn’t speak with his wife for years. At one point, his daughter called him while he was overseas. She was thinking about committing suicide. Instead of coming home to comfort her, he booked a flight for Vietnam. Years later, she ended up committing suicide successfully.

I’ve heard Bob Pierce’s story several times in recent years. There’s much to be admired in his life. His work has helped save the lives of millions of children. But there’s also a dark side. It makes me wonder what was driving Pierce. Was he casting out his own demons? Was he working through a tortured sense of guilt? Chances were, if you were to ask him, he probably would not have been able to tell you. That’s my guess. He was too busy saving the world to be in touch with his emotional life.

Enter Jack Bauer from 24. Bauer faces the same dilemma over and over again. He has to weigh lives in his hands and make a choice. For instance, last season he had to sacrifice the life of a man on an operating table (who, incidentally, saved Bauer’s life just hours before) in order to get information that would stop a nuclear weapon from nuking millions of people. It’s an ugly world, and Bauer has to make personal sacrifices in order to save lives. I wonder if Bob Pierce thought of his life in the same way.

I wonder what was going on in Bob Pierce’s mind when he chose to go to Vietnam rather than book a flight home to take care of his suicidal daughter. Was he weighing lives in his hands like Bauer?

“Hmmm….save a thousand children in Vietnam or go home and save my daughter.” What would you do?

The comparison is really imaginary. Scazzero says that there was nothing that would have prevented Pierce from going home. He had others to help. He wasn’t an indispensable counter terrorist agent.

I wonder how much Pierce was aware that he was dying on the inside. And I wonder if he actually knew what he was sacrificing.

Jack Bauer seems to know and yet he makes the choice to stay the course. He’s an emotional wreck, but it doesn’t matter because he doesn’t have time to deal with it. I think it was the ending of season 2 where he sits in the car for moment, starts breaking down in tears, and then he gets a call so he’s off again.

My mental connection between Jack Bauer and Bob Pierce has made me think of Pierce in a different light. I definitely feel more sympathy for him. Maybe if he had a conversation with Peter Scazzero he could have saved his family along with all the millions.

We were on vacation in Puerto Vallarta during the first week of the new year. Amy posted some pics. Here’s a few more.

That’s me giviing Emi an aerial. Uncle Dennis gave Mia a little swimming lesson.

Whale watching was one of the highlights of the trip. I took a lot of photos while on the boat, but hardly any of them turned out well. The boat was moving too much and the whales only came out for a couple of seconds. We were able to see a humpback do a full breach up close. It was amazing. Unfortunately, I wasn’t quick enough and all I captured was the splash. The picture on the right is a of a whale at full breach. I took it from shore. The tiny speck on the right is a humpback. Click on the photo to see a larger version on flickr.

We woke up to amazing sunrises everyday. For those of you at Meta, here’s the yellow light I was talking about.

How do you know when you’re really at rest?
When you get nailed by bird turd within the first hour of walking outside, and you can still laugh about it and pose for a picture. When you’re fascinated enough by a fly to take its picture. (Actually, I would have taken that fly picture any time. It was the size of a cherry tomato!)

This week we took Mia to her ultrasound appointment at Texas Children’s Hospital. It was the big test we’ve been waiting for, the test to see whether or not she actually has a thyroid. Amy and I have been very hopeful because of a few comments that our endocrinologist made back in November. It looked like Mia was producing thyroid of her own.

As I wrote back in November, I haven’t really had the faith to pray for complete healing. Honestly, it just didn’t occur to me. From the initial reports that we received, and the literature I read, this condition seemed permanent. We simply accepted this as the way it was going to be for her. My prayers and thoughts have been for Mia to grow up with more discipline and the character to endure the extra burdens that come with her condition.

For the last month, Amy and I started praying more in faith for complete healing. We didn’t pray incessantly, not like the way we’ve prayed for other friends and more life-threatening situations. But I can say I honestly prayed to God in faith and left it up to him.
What were the results of the test?

The nurse looked high and low, up Mia’s neck, down her chest. She even called the radiologist to come in and look, but there was no thyroid gland in sight.

What next?

I don’t know. I guess we’ll have to wait and see what the endocrinologist says. Why were her thyroid levels changing and elevated? I don’t know.

Amy and I are disappointed. We’re not devastated. This is the way things have been for Mia and this has been our expectation. Still, I’m praying for our little girl.

Several months ago, a new volunteer started helping out at our office. She comes once a week to help fold bulletins. She is, I’m guessing she is, in her twenties and she’s Chinese. She’s also mentally retarded. She’s an interesting character. She has a lot to say if you get her going. I’ve had a couple of conversations with her and I usually try to wave to her whenever I see her to help her feel welcome in our busy office.

Her story though has really made me think. It turns out that she wasn’t born with her current condition. When she was young, a bookcase fell on her head and caused her brain damage. I believe she was only 5 or 6 when it happened.

When I see this volunteer at church, I can’t help but think about Mia. This volunteer was born healthy, but her future was radically altered by this accident. Mia, born without a thyroid gland, was headed for a future with severe mental retardation and stunted physical development. But through medical intervention, she is now on the path to a “normal” future, whatever that is.

Whenever I compare their two stories, I come away grateful. There’s nothing to say that a terrible bookcase accident couldn’t happen to my kids, Amy, or even me. I’m just thankful that we have the life that we do. (I’m not saying that this woman volunteering at our church has a miserable life. I’ve seen her laugh and smile. She even ran up to me once and gave me a big, playful shove in the back. She has fun.) I’m thankful to God for our lives this year. For Amy, Emi, Mia, and my own. I really don’t deserve such a great family or the lives that we have.

Thanks God.